As of late...

Life and work defiantly, as of late, are on this insane roller coaster for me. Life has its challenges on a normal basis but with all things considered in the month of August life pretty much has taken a sharp turn down hill...Broken knees, loss of work, lack of management, back stabbings, needing to thicken my skin, crutches, illness, struggle....

I'm not one who typically gets sad or wallows in the mud or throws "pity parties" but good grief there are days when I can feel depression, stress and an overwhelming sense of tears waiting at the backdoor. Waiting for that one small crack to come barreling in or heck for someone or something to leave it open for a millisecond too long.

I'm typically not a night owl and am in bed by 8pm. Rather the early bird who is out catching the worms with the sprinklers on. Smiling, dancing, laughing and enjoying the peace and quiet before the hot sun or the storm. One who has always needed a serious 10-12 hours of sleep to "play nice with others" which means 6 am I'm ready to get the day going. However lately it's been a dragging chore for me to open my eyes that early let alone make my body move out of the comfort of my bed. The bed who doesn't care if I stay there all day. The bed who won't "fire" me because I sent a how to guide instead of doing a live "touchy feely" session on how things should run. The bed who doesn't wonder why I put make up on to go to the grocery store. The bed who hugs me when I lay down (totally have a temper-pedic bed and yes they hug you. There is nothing but warm and comfort laying in bed. The world can rear it's ugly head and just be ignored by laying here...sleeping...dreaming...reading...living in an imaginary world where I'm happy all the time.

I  know there is a light at the end of every tunnel but this one feels like it's a labyrinth of twists, turns, mountains (not grains of sands here folks) which all have their up sides (walking barefoot in the snow both ways) and their down sides (walking away holding your behind because it feels like you've been kicked by a mule).

I will get through this and keep the smile and laughter but there are just days, as of late.....that get me down.